29 April 2009

Swine Flu - The Art of Manipulation

Yes, my dear followers ...The End is near. The press and media made it clear that we are all going to go to Swine Heaven. Hopefully dressed up in a pink dress. Didn't you read it yet?
We are all lost...unless.....you buy something which will save you!
Yes, In the last hours of your time on earth one can even enter competitions like win a swine flu cake

Let me just make one important statement before I continue. I feel terribly sorry for all the victims of this flu so far and I do not intend to hurt the feelings of relatives which are now in a time of suffering. I do not deny that Swine Flu exists and that it might become a pandemic.

However, come on people!!! I am the only one who thinks that this is an incredible big fat hoax set up by those who want to make some more money by playing with our fear?

Congrats on all those serious newspaper and media guys and girls and congrats to the UK government which announced today that they have placed an order of 32 million surgery masks.
I hope those masks are meant to stop viruses and not bacterias. And I hope that the government knows the difference between the two of them. (viruses are a lot smaller then bacterias )

Also, why the did the UK Government order only 32 million? Did I miss something on the last population census? I states clearly 60,975,00 inhabitants in the United Kingdom. So, please, I beg those other 27 odd million...Run!!

I wonder what comes next? Hmm, probably something like Kangaroo Flu...or better Fish Flu
You all going to have to take compulsory vaccinations which you have to pay for and also folks, if your fashion does not apply to the rules of the latest Swine Flu code...you will probably be put down...Only as a form of precaution. So, please let me see you wearing those masks and please buy some proper Swine Flu fashion.

Anyways, I am happy that during my last hours on Planet Earth I am able to dedicate my time to the entire Swine Flu community.

Let me think what was big in this year so far.....ok, we had the CREDIT CRUNCH...now we have the SWINE FLU...I bet we are going to have at least one more big thing this year.

Many thanks again to all the News and Media guys. You are great! You all deserved you University degrees and job titles...

ok, that was it from me. I am already dressed up in a pink dress and I wearing a Swine Flu mask....Just in case


Talk to you again from Swine Flu heaven.


Swine Flu and out :)

1 comment:

Shannon said...

You might find it funny that there is a Swine Flu Cake Naming contest out there:http://apocalypsecakes.wordpress.com/2009/04/27/name-the-swine-flu-cake-win-this-chocolate-pig/

diggit if you like it